Monday, May 16, 2016

What if it was Your Child?

"I didn't realize who I was until I stopped being who I wasn't."
~Anonymous

The great bathroom debate of 2016. Crazy right?

Everyone has their knickers in a bunch over 0.3% of the population using a facility that correlates to their identity over what is between their legs. The majority of the outrage seems to come from a place of fear and confusion, often stating that it puts others in danger. (There has never been a case of a transgender person attacking another person in a bathroom. The statistic of transgenders being attacked by "regular" people is staggering.)

Personally, I'd be much more concerned about my boys at a Catholic school than going into a bathroom with a transgender gentleman (my apologies to my Catholic friends but you understand the statistical comparison). And my daughter would be safer with a young transgender lady versus a not insubstantial amount of sketchy testosterone-filled teenage boys with entitlement issues.

You know who is most likely to attack another person in a bathroom? Adult males. And I guarantee they will find a way to do it without trying to cross-dress as a disguise.

When I hear people discuss this issue with such blind passion against this already unfairly treated demographic I wish I could make them stop and ask themselves, "What if it were my child? What if my child had gender identity issues? How would I want them treated?"

It's easy to demonize a group you have no contact with or connection to (if you're the demonizing type). But what if, from a very young age, your precious Claire identified herself more as Jack? Or Charlie at age three preferred dresses and eventually ask that you please call her Katie by age six? Would you demonize them? Would you make them feel wrong, weird and dirty? Or would you love them and get them the support they need both inside and outside of the family?

What if it was your child?

In middle school my son befriended a transgender child. He was still going by his given name (born a girl) but he dressed as a boy and acted as such. And he was epically sad. So much so that he tried to take his life. I would find my child crying at night just from the pain he carried for his friend.

Over 40% of transgender people try to take their lives. It's not a frivolous, easy choice. They aren't just getting dolled up for a drag show. They are struggling to be who they are despite how society treats them. So society is going to make a simple human necessity one more way to make their lives harder?

Don't we have more important things to fight?

"But you can only lie about who you are for so long before going crazy."
~Ellen Wittlinger, Parrotfish


2 comments:

  1. Great moment to live in NC. Ugh.
    My neighbor was telling me she supports birth certificate bathroom placement. Said she found out you can change your gender on your NC birth certificate for $15.
    How did this become an issue? There ARE more important things to fight.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Great moment to live in NC. Ugh.
    My neighbor was telling me she supports birth certificate bathroom placement. Said she found out you can change your gender on your NC birth certificate for $15.
    How did this become an issue? There ARE more important things to fight.

    ReplyDelete