Tuesday, June 7, 2016

Rape Culture

"Most men fear getting laughed at or humiliated by a romantic prospect while most women fear rape and death."
~Gavin de Becker, The Gift of Fear: Survival signals that Protect us from Violence

Unless you've been living in a tree you have heard about Brock Turner and the ridiculous sentence he received for raping an unconscious woman behind a dumpster. Let me just start a list of the many things wrong with this story....

1) He only received six months or less with good behavior at a facility he most likely won't be treated to a taste of his own medicine.

2) No good behavior will help his victim heal faster. She will live with this for the rest of her life.

3) He never admitted or apologized for his actions, only admitting to drinking too much. So alcohol makes you a rapist? They should start putting that on the label. WARNING: May cause an urge to sexually assault another human being if you are already an asshole.

4) His father asked for leniency for his son's "20 minutes of action." It's like they were playing ping pong. Dear sir, have you ever been brutalized for 20 minutes? It sounds like a long f*cking time (sorry-blood boiling) even if unconscious your body will feel it later. This clearly shows where this kid learned his respect for women.

5) The above father was also wealthy enough to get the best slimy lawyer who could proceed to put the victim on trial. Is there any wonder so many rapes go unreported?

6) Brock's childhood friend defended him as so sweet and wonderful. Claiming it's not like a woman being abducted and raped. He doesn't deserve a jail sentence. His. Friend. Is. A. Girl!! I'm guessing she hasn't gone bar hopping with him recently.

7) What would have happened if those two brave men had not intervened? And let's remember the fact that one was so upset by what he had witnessed he was in tears. They will also have to heal from this.

The irony of this story is that if he were to have received a few years it still wouldn't have been enough but we never would have seen his face and learned his name. He would have done his time with little news media or recognition. Welcome to the spotlight you little bastard.

My heart goes out to the victim and all victims of such a crime. As someone who has experienced it, I can assure you it does not heal in six months or six years. It is something you carry forever. You survive and most of the time you forget. But it is an invisible scar that never leaves.

I apologize for my harsh words and my anger. This story just hits too close to my heart to not discuss. On the positive side, we are, as a society, having a discussion about campus rape, rape as a crime, victim rights and justice. My hope is that it is not just a discussion.

"But no matter how much evil I see, I think it's important for everyone to understand that there is much more light than darkness."
~Robert Uttaro, To the Survivors